From an 1895 book on life…

Women Who Make the Best Wives

1. Conscious of the Duties of Her Sex. - A woman conscious of the duties of her sex, one who unflinchingly discharges the duties allotted to her by nature, would no doubt make a good wife.

2. Good Wives and Mothers. - The good wives and mother are the women who believe in the sisterhood of women as well as in the brotherhood of men. The highest exponent of this type seeks to make her home something more than an abode where children are fed, clothes, and taught the catechism, The State has taken her children into politics by making their education a function of politicians. The good wife and homemakers says to her children, “Where thou goest, I will go.” She puts of her own inclinations to ease and selfishness. She studies the men who propose to educate her children; she exhorts mothers to sit beside fathers on the school board; she will even herself accept such thankless office in the interests of the helpless youth of the schools who need a mother’s as well as a father’s and a teacher’s care in this field of politics.

3. A Busy Woman. -As to whether a busy woman, that is , a woman who labors for mankind in the world outside her home, whether such an one can also be a good housekeeper, and care for her children, and make a real “Home Sweet Home!” with all the comforts by way of variation why! I am ready, as the result of years practical experience as a busy woman, to assert that women of affairs can also be women of true domestic tastes and habits.

4. Brainy Enough. - What kind of women make the best wives? The woman who is brainy enough to be a companion, wise enough to be a counselor, skilled enough in the domestic virtues to be a good housekeeper, and loving enough to guide in true paths the children with whom the home may be blessed.

5. Found the Right Husband. - The best wife is the woman who has found the right husband, a husband who understands her. A man will have the best wife when he rates that wife as queen among women. Of all women she should always be to him the dearest. This sort of man will not only praise the dishes made by his wife, but will actually eat them.

6. Bank Account. - He will allow his life companion a bank account, and will exact no itemized bill at the end of the month. Above all, he will pay the Easter bonnet bill without a word, never bring a friend to dinner without first telephoning home, -shore, he will comprehend that the woman who makes the best wife is the woman whom, by his indulgence of her ways and whims, he makes the best wife. So after all, good husbands have the most to do with making good wives.

7. Best Home Maker. - A woman to be the best home makers needs to be devoid of intensive “nerves.” She must be need and systematic, but not too neat, lest she destroy the comfort she endeavors to create. She must be distinctly amiable, ,while firm. She should have no “career,” or desire for a career, if she would fill to perfection the home sphere. She must be affectionate, sympathetic and patient, and fully appreciative of the worth and dignity of her sphere.

8. Know Nothing Whatsoever About Cooking or Sewing or Housekeeping. - I am inclined to make my answer to this question somewhat concise, after the manner of a text without the sermon. Like this: To be the “best wife” depends upon three things: first, an abiding faith with God; second, duty lovingly discharged as daughter, wife and mother; third, self improvement, mentally, physically and spiritually. With this as a text and as a glittering generality, let me touch upon one to tow practical essentials. I the course of every week it is my privileged to meet hundreds of young women - perspective wives. I am astonished to find that many of these know nothing whatsoever about cooking of sewing or housekeeping. Now, if a woman cannot broil a beefsteak, nor boil the coffee when it is necessary, if she cannot mend the linen, nor patch a coat, if she cannot make a bed, order the dinner, create a lamp shade, ventilate the house, nor do anything practical in the way of making home actually a home, how can she expect to make even a good wife, not so speak of a better of best wife? I need not continue this sermon. Wise girls will understand.

9. The Best Keeper of Home. - As to who is the best keeper of this transition home, memory pictures to me a woman grown white under the old slavery, still bound by it, in that little out-of-the-way Kansas town, but never so bound that she could not put aside the household tasks, at any time, for social intercourse, for religious conversation, for correspondence, for reading, and, above all, for making everyone who came near her feel that her home was the expressions of herself, a place of rest, study, and cultivation of affection. She did not exist for her walls, her carpets, her furniture; they existed for her and all who came to her. She considered herself the equal of all; and everyone else thought her the superior of all.

…loose enough to show I’m a lady.” I read that quote on Christa Taylor’s interview with Jasmine Baucham. I pondered and finally added it to my favourite quotes list.

It struck home to me, because whenever we’re going clothes hunting, I always go for the two sizes too big. I like loose clothes that hide me, but I’ve come to realize that hiding under things isn’t feminine. It may be modest, but when we are dressing to please our Creator we should make sure we are still maintaining our gender.

These past five years, skirts have come into play for me. I wear them 90% of the time that I am dressed, and usually a loose flowing top to go with them. But then I look like I am wearing a floral potato sack.

Recently, I’ve been watching what I wear and seeing how it affects my shape and such. I don’t have a defined waist, so I wear skirts and the pair of pants that sit higher on my waist, to create the curve I’m missing. And if I’m wearing a blouse, I have it pulled back and sewn around the upper waist to help add curves. Yet nothing hugs my figure.

I also happen to have broad shoulders which throws off my smaller waist. I enjoyed wearing shirts that I could hide under, but in reality, I was making it much worse. Too much fabric on top overwhelmed my lower half, making me look like a traffic sign. Now when I wear something a little more defined in shape, I have a top that is more equal to my lower half.

So, after reading Christa Taylor’s interview, I now have the goal to wear things that show I am a woman, but also that I am a lady.

I am a day late in getting this Birthday post up for my dear cousin, but it is better than none at all I may assume.

Many of you know her as Vintagegirl or SimplyVintagegirl or Miss Emily Rose, but all of these names only describe part of this wonderfully inspirational young lady who I happen to have as my cousin. We have been enemies, best friends, indifferent, and little terrorists to each other in the past…but for the past seven or eight years, we have been getting used to each other.

As she described in my birthday post, we weren’t the best of friends, for we both thought the other would disrupt our way of life. To me, she was a year older and I had to be careful with my toys, but to her I was probably the ‘little one’ who could not be trusted…and I am not sure if I could.

But the Lord has been bringing us closer throughout the years…of course we enjoyed each other. Sleep overs were fun until we got into a fight over what to do, or who got the fancy phone when we were playing library. But since then we have matured, and can now solve a problem with a few chuckles and compromises and then it is over. And since she and I have discovered to get along we have been the most intimate of companions. We are Anne Shirley and Diana Barry, Marianne and Elinor Dashwood,  Jo and Beth March. We are entirely different but so similar.

So, in honour of her birthday which was Sunday, I composed this small excerpt for her:

“She is a young lady who is productive. Productive in her relationship where she keeps the emotions flowing and never stops her love for her family. Productive in her hands, which the Lord has blessed her with, where she can sew, stitch, and paste to bring about a new outcome of the homemaking arts. Productive in her life, living for the Lord, serving her family and elders, and not allowing trials to set her off her course.

She is beautiful. Beautiful in her speech, her thoughts, her temper, and her motives. She prays to become a wife and mother and raise many little ones, and she diligently prepares herself to be a Biblical helpmeet.

She is modest. She does not bring attention to herself, her talent, her actions, or her attire. Being a somewhat lacker of height, she is able to blend, but she does not soak the glory or the consequences of her actions in any way, but she is proud of what she is able to do: take photographs, sew, play the violin, cook, and many more.

She is real. She loves to have fun, joke, humor me, laugh, watch movies, go to conventions, converse, listen to my stories which can go on for hours at a time, listen to instrumental music, and play games. My dear cousin is an enjoyable girl with a great personality and a fondness for people…for she is a people person and somewhat thrives on human companionship.”

Happy Birthday Emily Rose!