God has blessed us with the ability to temporarily take leave of our senses when we are in pain, like trekking to safety with broken bones or passing out when the throbbing pulses of our nerves indicate severe injury, but occasionally that ability can come into play in unwanted circumstances, like today.

I’ve never been good with blood. The first time I passed out was at eight or nine in a hospitable and since then it’s been a somewhat predictable pattern of fainting. The last time I passed out Mom sat me in the chair so I wouldn’t hit my head falling to the floor like all the previous times, but that chair didn’t stop me. I just found a different route to the floor, though indeed a little less bumpy.

Well today, I was a little nervous as I needed to have blood drawn. 4 little vials waited beside me and the room was small and oddly lit, but the lady was very kind, hinting at my nervousness. I made it through 3 vials and then it started; that horribly uncomfortable silent-movie-type of symptom. My vision became blurry and I couldn’t hear the faces talking to me. An intense sweat broke out over my body and I immediately tried to read something on the wall to occupy my mind but before I could finish the poster on coughing, I performed the ‘classic Margaret faint‘, as Mom calls it. Apparently I went white and for someone who always has a rosiness in their cheeks, white means white. My head fell forward and my body shook for a little bit and then I came to.

The lady, when I awoke, was impressed with my “Snow White” fainting which made me feel better since I was unconscious in front of her. Compared to my somewhat unattractive routines in the past, this fainting was very proper and the closest I’ve ever come to fainting like in the movies. You know - the elegant sigh, the back of the hand against the fevered brow, and then the sweeping fall to the couch, ground, or in the below case - into the arms of those standing by.  I hate to bust the bubble of those who have never fainted, but let me tell you…the actual process is not elegant in any way, sadly.

From my perspective, during the seconds in which I was “gone”, I experienced a very fascinating example of the mysteries of the mind. In those fifteen seconds I saw every Dick Van Dyke episode flash before my mind in a fifties type of reel. For those wondering why, I had just watched an episode of Dick Van Dyke before leaving. Case solved.